How I Got Hooked Up With
by Autobotschic
Summary: A whole bunch of one shots about how your favorite mechs get a date with their favorite femme. robot pickup lines belong to their respective owners!
1. Mirage

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. All the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Mirage

Femme's Name: Holographic ( Holo)

Her Story:

Holographic-Holo to her friends- was sitting on a cliff near the edge of Diego Garica. The sun was setting, reds, pinks, oranges, blues, and purples painted the sky like a picture.

" It's so beautiful," Holo sighed, placing her hands on her knees. Holo's redish-orange paint job glimmered in the setting sunlight.

" Just like you," a mech whispered into Holo's audio. Holo jumped and smiled when she relized it was only her friend, Mirage.

" Oh hey Mirage," Holo said, patting the ground next to her. Mirage sat down, but looked odd.

"I'm invisable," Mirage said.

Holo looked at Mirage. " Really?" She asked puzzled.

" Can you see me?" Mirage asked.

" Yes..." Holo replied, having no clue where this was going.

" How about tomorrow night? Meet me at my quarters at 7 pm sharp!" Mirage finsihed, winking at Holo, he strode off.

" Smooth, Mirage, very smooth," Holo whispered chuckling.

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Muahahaha! There you have it! My first chapter of: How I got hooked up with!

_PLease review and/or PM me. Cause I really don't think this will get a lot of hits!_


	2. Bumblebee

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. All the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Bumblebee

Femme's Name: Firefly

Her Story:

A shortish red figure could be seen walkinhg aimlessly in the woods near Portland, Washington. The red femme's name was Firefly.

Firefly was walking around in the woods when she spotted a yellow beetle-the car, not the bug- racing towards her at high speed. The beetle skidded to a halt then transformed into a small yellow mech, about the height of Firefly.

" H-hello," Firefly whispered shyly, " I'm Firefly."

The yellow mech stood and looked over Firefly's red form. His optics shone A bright blue.

" Hi," the yellow mech said, " I'm Bumblebee."

" Hello Bumblebee," Firefly whispered, avoiding optics contact with Bumblebee. Then she looked up.

" Hi Firefly," Bumblebee whispered, then said shyly," Are you lost? Because heaven's a long way from here."

Firefly giggled. " Your so sweet. Yes, I am lost, but I'm not an angel," Firefly giggled, reaching out for Bumblebee's hand.

" Oh, you looked like one," Bumblebee replied, taking Firefly's hand.

" Can you take me to the Ark, Bumblebee?" Firefly asked.

" S-sure!" Bumblebee replied.

Firefly and Bumblebee then walked ahnd and hand back to the Ark.

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Muahahaha! There you have it! My second chapter of: How I got hooked up with!

_Please review and/or PM me. Cause I really don't think this will get a lot of hits!_


	3. Wheeljack

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. All the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Wheeljack

Femme's Name: Tetryl

Her Story:

Tetryl careful poured some water in a container. The white and silver femme then carefully picked up some potossium shards and quickly dropped the shards in the container. Tetryl quickly ducked behind some glass as the explosion occoured.

Wheeljack came strolling into the lab right after the explosion.

" Whoa, I must be in the wrong lab," Wheeljack said, looking around.

" No, I just had to borrow your lab for a bit," Tetryl replied, stepping out from behind the glass.

" Oh, are you an alien? Because you just abducted my spark," Wheeljack whispered into Tetryl's audio, holding her hand.

Tetryl smiled back, then the two went off to work on a new nucleaor power reactor.

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Wheeljack smiled and held Tetryl's hand as the two finished a new bomb. The bomb went off accidently, causing the two to go flying, and for Tetryl to land on top of Wheeljack.

" I think were perfect for each other, what do you think?" Wheeljack asked, kissing Tetryl.

" Does potossium and water make a bad combination?" Tetryl replied, hugging Wheeljack and kissing him back.

" Yessssssss," Wheeljack mumbled.

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Muahahaha! Nothing like explosive and scientific love! There you have it! My third chapter of: How I got hooked up with!

_Please review and/or PM me. Cause I really don't think this will get a lot of hits!_


	4. Ratchet

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. Most of the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Ratchet the Hatchet

Femme's Name:Moonracer

Her Story:

_Moonracer, you are needed in the Rec. Room for an Energon refil. _Shadowca Prime comm. linked Moonracer.

_Alright Shadowca, on my way_. Moonracer replied. She quickly walked towards the Rec. Room in the N.E.S.T base on Diego Garica.

Moonracer trotted into the Rec. Room and over to the kitchen.

" Hey Springset, one cup of Eneron," Moonracer whispered. Springracer quickly handed a cup of purpleish liquid to the tall blue femme. Moonracer took a sip and sat down in a table at the far end of the room.

Ratchet then came up and sat beside her. He leaned in and whispered in her audio.

" What does it feel like to be the most beautiful femme in this room?" Ratchet cooed.

Moonracer blushed. " I'm not anywhere near as beautiful as Shadowca, Ratchet," Moonracer whispered.

Ratchet scoffed and pulled Moonracer into his chest. " You are to me, and that's what matters," Ratchet replied, tracing Moonracer's cheeks.

Moonracer smiled and snuggled into Ratchet's chest even more. " You may be old, but your as sharp as a tack," Moonracer whispered happily.

Ratchet grinned. " Now, I believe your needed for some private 'tests' Moonracer," Ratchet whispered, picking up Moonracer, he ran to Med Bay.

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Muahahaha! ! There you have it! My fourth chapter of: How I got hooked up with!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am running out of ideas and I really don't think this is getting a lot of hits!_


	5. Ironhide

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. Most of the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. And I couldn't decide what color to do Chromia...so I stuck with her G1 blue. She is still a motorcyle. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Ironhide

Femme's Name: Chromia

Her Story:

Chromia carefully picked up the Ion blaster. " Let us see what you can do..." she whispered. She fired a few practice shots, all on target.

Chromia smiled wickedly, then took off on her wheeled foot. Shooting, dodging, swiveling around the drones, all her shots were on target. Then she made it to the part of the shooting range where the boss drone comes out of no-where. Chromia carefully wheeled around, her Ion blaster hot and pulsing.

Chromia's optics darted around, then she spoted a black mass coming towards her and a giant drone come up behind her. Chromia smiled and took a second blaster off her hip, then shot both of the masses. All fifteen shots were dead on each target.

Chromia smiled and placed both blasters on her holister sling on her hip. Then wheeled towards the black mass.

Chromia smiled at Ironhide. " Hey 'Hide," Chromia said winking.

Ironhide looked at all the little white shots staining her black armor. He then smiled suggestively, "If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction," he whispered to Chromia.

Chromia smiled. " Same goes for you," she replied, then the two walked/wheeled back to their quarters.

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Muahahaha! ! My fifth chapter of: How I got hooked up with!

Check out my poll on my profile page too!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am running out of ideas and I really don't think this is getting a lot of hits!_


	6. Optimus Prime

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. Most of the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. And I really wanted to do a Shadow Stalker/optimus Prime one, and this little snipet took place on Cybertron. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Optimus Prime

Femme's Name: Shadow Stalker

Her Story:

Shadow Stalker quickly walked down the road to Iacon tryping up a report on the low Energon stats on a data pad. " Primus, first Megatron wants all time power, now he wants all the Energon, and were suppose to run off Energon sticks this entire time? I don't _think_ so!" Shadow Stalker hissed.

Shadow Stalker then bumped into her Supreme Leader, Optimus Prime. " Oh! Optimus Prime! I'm so sorry!" Shadow Stalker stuttered from her place on the ground. Optimus chuckled and reached down to pull up Shadow Stalker.

" I am eternaly sorry Optimus, I really am," Shadow Stalker whispered, never looking into her leader's optics.

Optimus chuckled and kneeled down in front of Shadow Stalker. " Shadow Stalker, if beauty were time, you would be an eternity," Optimus whispered, holding Shadow Stalker's hand.

Shadow Stalker smiled shyly. " W-w-wow Optimus, I had no idea," Shadow Stalker stuttered.

Optimus smiled and stood up. He then quickly kissed Shadow Stalker and transformed and drove off.

Shadow Stalker stood swaying on the road. " Woo hoo!" she yelled, transforming into her intergalatic jet mode and zooming around Iacon.

She transformed with her wings pointed happily up and strode into Iacon, ignoring everyone's odd looks.

" Today, is a great day," Shadow Stalker whispered to herself, then skipped into her quarters.

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Muahahaha! ! My sixth chapter of: How I got hooked up with! Anyone notice how girlyish Shadow Stalker reacted? I was having one of those days. Stupid girly instintics! I wnna go back to my awesome camo cargo shorts and my awesome firehouse shirt! I hate pink and purple! RAWR!

Sorry for my little outburst. R&R!

Check out my poll on my profile page too!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am running out of ideas and I really don't think this is getting a lot of hits!_


	7. Jazz

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. Most of the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. And I really wanted to do a Shadow Stalker/optimus Prime one, and this little snipet took place on Cybertron. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Femme's Name: Melody

Her Story:

Melody walked into the elevator and grasped her data pad. " Prime's going to love this!" Melody chuckled. She push the level 4 button and the elevator jolted to life. The elevator creaked to a stop at level 7, and Jazz walked in.

" Jazz," Melody greeted.

" Melody," Jazz chuckled, most likely smiling under his battle mask. Melody shuffled to the back, tripping over her feet.

She fell down and papers and data pads flew everywhere. " Ugh," she moaned. She picked herself up and kneeled over, gathering the data pads.

A hand reached down and Melody smiled, knowing it was Jazz. She accepted his hand and stood up, Jazz offered her her papers.

" Thanks, Jazz," Melody whispered.

Jazz chuckled. " You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me," Jazz said. Then half his visor dissapered, hence he was winking.

Melody smiled and waved as Jazz got off the elevator. Melody then sighed and listened to the creaking elevator, then pushed the level 5 button, the stop Jazz's room was on.

Muahahaha! ! My Seventh chapter of: How I got hooked up with! R&R!

Check out my poll on my profile page too!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am really running out of ideas!_


	8. Prowl

Alright, I got these Ideas straight from a book called: They are Mechs. Most of the pick up lines belong to MissBombtasic. Not me. Oh, and I accidently added something I didn't mean to on the Jazz on. So.. on with the show!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Prowl

Femme's Name: Lightflasher

Her Story:

Lightflasher's yellow and white frame stood a shadowy outline in the door way, blocking Sideswipe and Sunstreaker from running away again.

" Now, what have you two been up to to have you running like mice from a cat?" Lightflasher tisked. The two brother huddled together.

" I didn't do anything, but Sunny painted Prowl pink!" Sideswipe squeaked.

" Ya!" Sunstreake said, " Wait, I mean no!"

Then the two bolted away, leaving Lightflasher laughing quietly. The femme started walking towards her quarters when a black and white mech stood in front of her.

" Prowl," Lightflasher stated with a slight chuckle. Prowl stood infront of Lightflasher with his arms crossed over his chest and a slight upline of his lips, a smile, Lightflasher relized.

"I was blinded by your beauty so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons," Prowl stated.

Lightflash smiled and hande Prowl a piece of metal and in Cybertronian was her name, her room number, and her comm. link channel.

" Take me away, officer," Lightflasher teased, holding out her hands to be handcuffed. Prowl then did something very rare, he grinned.

Prowl handcuffed Lightflasher and took her to his quarters.

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Muahahaha! ! My Ninth chapter of: How I got hooked up with! R&R!

Check out my poll on my profile page too!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am really running out of ideas!_


	9. Hot Rod

Alright, to get this straight, I will do requests _after_ I finish what I have written down. Alright? So you can stop nagging T.J!

( This was my first request my friend continued to bug me about).

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Hot Rod

Femme's Name: Camshaft

Her Story:

Camshaft strode along side Shadow Stalker as the two best friends made thier way towards their quarters. " Shadow, do you think Roddy likes me?" Camshaft nervously asked her friend.

Shadow thought for a moment. " I have no idea, but the way he acts around you, I'm going to say yes," Shadow Stalker concluded.

Camshaft squealed, and Shadow laughed and shook her head. " Wow, sometimes you are_ such_ a grily girl Camshaft!" Shadow Stalker exclaimed. Camshaft crossed her arms over her chest and pouted.

" Hello femmes of Earth," Hot Rod yelled from behind the duo.

" Hey Hot Rod!" Shadow Stalker exclaimed coolly.

Camshaft waved shyly.

" Hey, Camshaft, meet me tonight at seven at the cliff sides," Hot Rod whispered before he strode off.

Camshaft giggled and ran all the way to her quarters. " Hey! What about me!" Shadow Stalker yelled after her friend, she sighed and walked into her quarters.

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Camshaft's legs dangled off the cliffs, the sun was setting and painting the sky all sorts of red, oranges, pinks, purples, and blues.

" Hello beautiful," Hot Rod whispered, sitting beside Camshaft.

" Hi Roddy," Camshaft whispered faintly. Hot Rod and Camshaft looked loveingly at each other.

" Your father must ave been a thief, he stole all the stars out of the sky and put them in your eyes," Hot Rod whispered, leaning closer to Camshaft.

Camshaft smiled. " Your not so bad yourself," she giggled, snuggling into Hot Rod's side.

Hot Rod smiled at Camshaft, and they sat for awhile before Hot Rod spoke again.

" I must have died and gone to heaven, because my spark was just taken by an angel," Hot Rod whispered, leaning in even closer to Camshaft.

Camshaft grinned, and pulled Hot Rod into a kiss. Hot Rod's optics got extremly wide, then closed as both soon to be sparkmates enjoyed the rest of the sunset.

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Muahahaha! ! My Tenth chapter of: How I got hooked up with! R&R!

Check out my poll on my profile page too!

Alright, onto the serious notes.

1: Happy Autobot Trapjaw? It toook me days to think of this! So can you now stop nagging?

2: I have 3 more of these to do before I can start taking and doing requests, so wait until then, thank you.

3: Thank you all for reading!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am really running out of ideas!_


	10. Hound

Alright, to get this straight, I will do requests _after_ I finish what I have written down.

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Hound

Femme's Name: Akita

Her Story:

Akita transformed from her blank and white jeep mode into her bipedal mode and looked around at the valley below her.

" This is should be a nice spot to get away for awhile," Akita annouced to herself. Akita sat down, her legs dangling off the side of the cliff.

Suddenly, the ground began to shake, and Akita jumped up and tripped, falling into Hound's arms.

" Whoa! Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?" Hound chuckled, grinning coyly.

" Oops, sorry Hound, I'll be going then," Akita whispered, quickly transforming and zooming down the rocky mountain path.

Hound chuckled, transformed, and took off after Akita.

A few hours later, Akita was sitting quietly by a glistening blue lake. Akita saw Hound look around then smile at her.

" I'm sorry, but do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!" Hound annouced, plopping down next to her.

Akita laughed and snuggled up to Hound. " Your one sly dog Hound," Akita exclaimed, laying her head on his shoulder.

" Aren't I?" Hound replied, wrapping his arms snuggly around Akita.

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Muahahaha! ! My Eleventh chapter of: How I got hooked up with! R&R!

Alright, onto the serious notes.

1: I _think_ 1-2 more of these to do before I can start taking and doing requests, so wait until then, thank you.

2: Thank you all for reading!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am really running out of ideas!_


	11. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker

Alright, to get this straight, I will do requests _after_ I finish what I have written down.

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker

Femmes's Names: Daisy and Sabre

Their Stories:

Daisy and Sabre were twins. Daisy was a pale yellow, and Sabre was a deep orange color. Both femmes we well trained in swordsmen ship, as were the two mechs who had their eyes set on the pair.

" Sabre, catch!" Daisy yelled, throwing her sister a longsword, while manovering a cannon blast on her two wheeled feet.

Sabre caught the sword and easily sliced a decoy enemy's head off, " I think's that's enough for today, Daisy!"

Just then, as the two twin's feet tranformed back to normal, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker made their move. Sunstreaker put his arm around Daisy's shoulder.

" Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me," Sunstreaker said grinning.

Daisy grinned and retorted. " Finally you've come! I've been waiting _forever_!"

Sideswipe then made his move and held Sabre's hand. "Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after," Sideswipe whispered, tracing Sabre's cheek bones. Then he grinned widely.

" Smooth Sides, very smooth," Sabre laughed. Then the two pairs of twins walked away to the training grounds, hopefully to practice their training.

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Muahahaha! ! My Twelfth chapter of: How I got hooked up with! R&R!

Alright, onto the serious notes.

1: I am now done with my ideas, so you can start sending in your requests for your own characters.

2: Thank you all for reading!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am really running out of ideas!_


	12. Jolt

Alrightly people, you may now start sending requests!

How I Got Hooked Up With...

Jolt

Femme's Names: Atomica

Her Story:

Atomica was very electric, or so most mechs said. Her slim but tough frame was red with blue and silver accents, and her dark blue optics shimmered. Atomica was really not interested in any mech that drooled at her feet. It was the one mech that wasn't that she really wanted. Jolt, the Autobot medic trainee and warrior.

Atomica desperately wanted Jolt to notice her, to look at her, even to _glance_ at her, instead of working with Ratchet all day. Atomica was getting a little desperate to have him notice her. She sat in her quarters for hours on end, trying to think up a solution.

" Ah! This is hopeless!" Atomica wailed, flinging herself onto her recharge berth. A small knock on the door made Atomica cringe, and snarl at the bot outside.

" Go away!"

The Autobot didn't listen, and knocked harder. Atomica screamed at the door and threw a metal hinge at it. The door opened and in stepped Jolt. Atomica was shocked.

" Oh... Hi Jolt..." Atomica giggled sheepishly.

Jolt smiled and sat next to Atomica on her berth. " I heard you screaming while I was working on a new weapon. You okay?" Jolt asked, rubbing the back of his helm nervously.

Atomica laughed. " Ya, I'm fine... Uh, Sunny was ya know... Hitting on me again," Atomica lied.

Jolt snickered. " He really doesn't know when to give up does he?"

Atomica smiled. " No, no he doesn't."

Jolt smiled and cautiously moved closer to Atomica. Atomica decided to be a little brave.

" Mind if I help you with the new weapon?"

" Sure! I'd love to have you help!" Jolt said a little to quickly.

Atomica smiled. " See you tomorrow?"

" Yep!" Jolt said happily and left the room. Atomica smiled, and skipped down the halls to the Rec. Room

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Jolt stood leaning against the giant weapon as Atomica stepped closer. Atomica took a moment to just study his frame. His handsome frame flanked with dark blue metal. Those bright optics, the whips ready to lash out at any moment, and that smile.

" Coming Atomica?" Jolt called. Atomica snapped out of her daydream and jogged the last few meters.

" Alright, so what's the weapon?" Atomica asked.

Jolt took off the giant sheet covering it, and out popped a giant magnet. " Wow," Atomica said. She then had a brilliant idea.

" Ya, it's pretty powerful alright," Jolt stated, walking in front of the magnet," It could bring in Megatron and hold him for a little over 7 hours!"

Atomica smiled, and watched Jolt aline himself with the magnet, then she switched it on.

" Oh course," Jolt started, then the magnet's powerful electric field sucked him onto the magnet. Atomica laughed.

" And If I keep the switch on, how long will you stay here?"

Jolt laughed. " A long time!"

Jolt then got very serious. " Atomica, are you a magnet? Cause I seemed to be attracted to you."

Atomica grinned. " I'm a Jolt magnet, if that's what you mean."

Jolt smiled, and Atomica flipped off the switch.

Jolt then proceeded to walk over to Atomica, and give her a long kiss.

"Finally," Atomica thought, " Finally."

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Muahahaha! ! My Thirteenth chapter of: How I got hooked up with! R&R!

Alright, onto the serious notes.

1:You may now send in requests!

2: Thank you all for reading!

_Please review and/or PM me. I am really running out of ideas!_


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